Certain hormonal changes, along with other pregnancy-related discomforts can sink a good night’s sleep. Here's how to snooze more soundly. The Gist
Like the perfect maternity outfit, sleep is something many pregnant women covet. My second and third pregnancies, for instance, were plagued with such bad morning sickness that I was left vomiting throughout the night. When that eased, my son’s kicking became so intense that one particularly sharp jab in the middle of the night caused me to awake to soaked sheets — I’d peed all over my bed. According to one study published in the journal Sleep Medicine in 2015, most women experience some type of sleep problem during pregnancy. Of the 2,427 women surveyed, for example, all reported frequent nighttime wakings while they were pregnant; nearly 60 percent reported insomnia; and about 80 percent found it difficult to find a comfortable sleeping position. “My patients always come to me in a panic because they’re worried about not sleeping,” said Dr. Laura Riley, M.D., an ob-gyn at New York-Presbyterian/Weill Cornell Medical Center in New York City. But this sleep deprivation isn’t harmful in any way to you or your baby. “Your body will naturally protect itself and make sure you fall asleep eventually,” Dr. Riley added. “You’ll get the rest you need.” Still, after reviewing the latest scientific studies and recommendations and consulting with three ob-gyns, one sleep expert and a professor of nursing who’s well-versed in the topic, I found several research-backed strategies to help you get a sounder snooze. Understand the sources of your sleep troubles Each trimester can bring a litany of different bodily changes that can affect sleep, noted Dr. Riley. Progesterone levels rise during the first three months of pregnancy, for instance, which can increase sleepiness; but at the same time you may be struggling with nausea, which can make it harder for you to doze off. During your second trimester, your growing uterus puts pressure on your bladder, which can lead to the need for multiple bathroom breaks at night. The third trimester, however, is when “pure, sheer discomfort hits,” said Dr. Riley. Your rapidly expanding uterus can push acid from your stomach up your esophagus, triggering heartburn; while the weight of carrying your baby may lead to back pain and leg cramps. Combine these with your ever-increasing bathroom trips, and you’ve got the recipe for nights of fitful, uncomfortable sleep. 1. Sleep on your side As your pregnancy progresses, your burgeoning belly may make it harder and harder to find and settle on a pleasant sleeping position. While it’s generally O.K. to sleep any way that’s comfortable during your first and the beginning of your second trimesters, experts recommend trying to sleep on your side after about 20 weeks. “As your uterus gets bigger, it lies on top of your inferior vena cava, which is the large blood vessel that provides blood to your heart,” explained Dr. Salena Zanotti, M.D., an ob-gyn at the Cleveland Clinic in Ohio. If your uterus rests on this vessel — which runs behind your abdominal cavity from your legs to your heart — for too long, it could cause a sharp dip in blood pressure that could theoretically impede blood flow to both you and your baby. A 2017 study published in the journal B.J.O.G., for example, found that of more than 1,000 women who answered questionnaires about their sleeping positions, those who reported sleeping on their backs during their third trimesters had more than double the risk of stillbirth than those who slept on their sides. Other, older studies have found similar results. But if you do end up on your back accidentally, reassured Dr. Zanotti, “we find that women will automatically either wake up on their own or instinctively shift over to their side in their sleep because they feel uncomfortable and light headed.” If you’re concerned about rolling over from your side, Dr. Zanotti recommended putting a pillow between your back and the mattress, so even if you do end up on your back, you’ll be on a tilt, which puts less pressure on the inferior vena cava. 2. Prop yourself on pillows strategically. Many pregnant women experience heartburn, back pain, nasal congestion and even trouble breathing due to both the pressure of their expanding uterus and hormonal changes. While these conditions may be present during the day, you may notice them more at night because you’re lying down (which can make symptoms like heartburn worse) and there are fewer things to distract you when you’re resting. You can often relieve these uncomfortable symptoms by simply propping yourself up with pillows so that you’re sleeping at a 45-degree angle, said Dr. Sally Ibrahim, M.D., a sleep specialist at the Cleveland Clinic. You can also place a pillow between your bent knees while lying on your side to help relieve back pain, along with one under your stomach to support its weight and one behind your back to deter you from rolling over. There’s no need to spend money on a pricey pregnancy pillow, but if you can’t find relief with the ones you have at home, you might consider a body pillow, advised Dr. Ibrahim. The Wirecutter, a New York Times company that does rigorous product reviews, recommends the Bluestone Full Body Contour U Pillow or the Snuggle-Pedic Memory Foam Body Pillow. 3. Practice good sleep hygiene. Many of the same strategies that can help you sleep when you’re not pregnant can help you sleep when you are, said Dr. Ibrahim. These include sticking to a regular sleep schedule (waking up and going to bed at the same time each day), cutting off caffeine after lunch (health experts recommend no more than 200 milligrams of caffeine, or the amount in a 12-ounce cup of coffee, per day if you’re pregnant), and avoiding the use of electronic devices such as smart phones, tablets and laptops since many emit a type of light called blue light, which can make it harder to fall asleep. Regular exercise is also key. The United States Department of Health and Human Services recommends that pregnant women get at least 150 minutes of moderate exercise such as brisk walking or swimming each week. But try to exercise earlier in the day — at least four hours before bedtime — since evening workouts can raise your body temperature and heart rate and make it more difficult to fall asleep, said Dr. Kathryn Lee, Ph.D., R.N., a professor of nursing at the University of California, San Francisco. Another good option to consider is yoga. Though there haven’t been many formal studies on the topic, one small Japanese study published in The Journal of Obstetrics and Gynaecology Research in 2018 found that among 38 pregnant women who had at least one 1-hour yoga session each week, those who were in their third trimesters reported getting more sleep and had fewer nighttime wakings than the 53 pregnant women who didn’t practice yoga. Avoid napping as much as possible, said Dr. Ibrahim. It’s tempting, especially with the fatigue of the first trimester, but anything more than a brief 30- to 60-minute cat nap can lead to trouble falling asleep at night. 4. Avoid dehydration. Increased progesterone levels, along with a rapidly expanding uterus pushing against your bladder, mean more trips to the bathroom. While it can merely be an annoyance during the day, it can be downright frustrating at night when you’re awoken for the umpteenth time. “The temptation many pregnant women have is to cut down on what they drink,” said Dr. Riley. “But that’s a bad idea.” Your body needs fluid, not just for you, but for the baby too. Dehydration during pregnancy can also make you more susceptible to leg cramps or Braxton Hicks, aka “false” contractions. The Office on Women’s Health recommends that pregnant women drink at least 10 cups of fluid, preferably water, each day. (Coffee and tea are fine too, just remember to avoid going over the 200-milligram limit of caffeine per day.) If you find that you’re waking up more than once or twice a night to urinate, plan on getting the bulk of your liquids during the morning and afternoon. Cut off all liquids about two hours before bed. 5. Avoid sleep aids if you can. According to a study published in the journal Obstetric Medicine in 2015, about 4.5 percent of pregnant women in the United States say they’ve taken over-the-counter or prescription sleep aids during their pregnancies. But, said Dr. Riley, “I tell my patients not to use them.” While diphenhydramine (Benadryl), the most commonly recommended over-the-counter sleep medicine by doctors, can help and is safe to take occasionally while pregnant, it loses its effectiveness if you take it more than once or twice a week, Dr. Riley said. Some doctors prescribe zolpidem (Ambien), but that may carry risks: One Taiwanese study of nearly 12,500 pregnant women published in the journal Clinical Pharmacology and Therapeutics in 2010 found that the nearly 2,500 pregnant women who used zolpidem for more than 30 days during their pregnancies had a 39 percent increased risk of low birthweight, 49 percent increased risk of preterm delivery and a 74 percent increased rate of C-section compared to the women who didn’t take the drug. Dr. Riley also advised against using the dietary supplement melatonin. “We just don’t have enough information about its safety,” she said. When to Worry If you or your sleeping partner notice that you’re snoring, see your doctor. While snoring becomes common as pregnancy progresses (some research suggests that nearly half of all pregnant women snore), it could be a sign of sleep apnea — a serious sleep condition which causes a temporary cessation of breathing while sleeping. Pregnant women with sleep apnea are not only more likely to be diagnosed with pre-eclampsia and gestational diabetes, but they also tend to have longer hospital stays after giving birth and serious pregnancy complications such as congestive heart failure and cardiomyopathy (enlarged heart muscles). It’s important to talk to your doctor if you snore, said Dr. Ibrahim, especially if you have other risk factors for sleep apnea such as being overweight or if you have been diagnosed with hypertension (high blood pressure), Type 2 diabetes or pre-eclampsia during your pregnancy. Weight gain during pregnancy can also worsen sleep apnea, as it can lead to the accumulation of more fat around the neck area. If you have symptoms, your doctor can refer you to a sleep specialist who can conduct a sleep study and prescribe treatment, which usually involves wearing a continuous positive airway pressure device while sleeping. C.P.A.P. devices deliver a constant flow of pressurized air to help keep your airway open. Symptoms usually improve after delivery. Also talk to your doctor if you have an uncontrollable twitchy feeling in your lower legs. According to the National Sleep Foundation, about 15 percent of pregnant women develop restless leg syndrome — an almost uncontrollable urge to move the legs, particularly in the evenings — in the last trimester of their pregnancies. Symptoms, which tend to worsen at night and improve after any kind of movement, typically resolve after giving birth. But developing it in one pregnancy ups your chances of doing so in later ones, said Dr. Ibrahim. In some cases, an iron or folic acid deficiency can be to blame for R.L.S. during pregnancy, so it’s important for your doctor to check your blood levels of both. If your levels are low, your doctor may recommend a supplement. Most doctors also recommend cutting out caffeine; getting 30 minutes of exercise most days of the week; and avoiding sedating antihistamines, such as Benadryl, which can worsen the problem. While there are medications for R.L.S., such as ropinirole (Requip), it’s still not clear how safe these are to use during pregnancy, so doctors recommend avoiding them. Everyone has to maintain a financial budget and how much money should you save before having a baby, it's difficult thing but you can learn about it just drop your comments in the comment section.
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It’s a question that often plagues new parents, but clues from our evolutionary past can help explain why we wean and when. I never intended to be one of those people who would whip out a boob for a toddler old enough to demand milk using full sentences. When I was pregnant, I hoped I’d be able to breastfeed at all. If things worked out, I thought, I’d continue for a normal amount of time and stop before it got, you know — weird. But what’s a normal amount of time to breastfeed? The American Academy of Pediatrics and the World Health Organization suggest feeding a baby only breast milk, if you can swing it, for six months. After that, the A.A.P. recommends supplementing breast milk with solid foods until age 1; the W.H.O. goes further by recommending some breastfeeding along with solids until age 2 or beyond. But there’s nothing like delivering a child to remind yourself that whichever guidelines you read on your computer screen, you’re still an animal driven by biology. Since mammals first evolved some 200 million years ago, they’ve come up with countless ways to nurse their young: underwater, upside-down, a dozen at a time. The echidna — an egg-laying mammal that looks like a hedgehog with a long snout — has no nipples at all. She leaks milk straight out of skin patches in her abdominal pouch for her baby to lap up. What is “normal”? Turns out, the average human mother is a pretty weird kind of mammal. We’re driven to make decisions not just by our biology, but by the judgments of ourselves and others, and the flexibility of our social structures. And compared with our closest relatives like chimps and orangutans, what makes humans unique — and possibly so successful as a species — is not so much how we nurse, but how we stop nursing. The history in our teeth My daughter and I had no trouble breastfeeding. As an infant, she hated many things, loudly, but loved nursing. That enthusiasm didn’t fade as we passed her first birthday. I nursed her at singalongs, on a squash court at a college graduation, and on airplanes, with my nipple inches from a stranger’s elbow. We kept this up for well over two years. Many of my friends, meanwhile, started to wean their own babies and toddlers when they were around 1. Daniel Sellen, Ph.D., an anthropologist at the University of Toronto, was quick to remind me that while breastfeeding my child into her toddler years may have seemed unusual among my peer group, my global perspective on nursing — as a white, college-educated, heterosexual American mom — was limited. In many parts of the world, for instance, it’s perfectly normal for mothers to openly nurse a child who’s 2 or 3. And while it’s true that fewer than 16 percent of moms in the United States are still nursing at 18 months, longer nursing is more common in certain pockets of the country — “Your Davises, your Portlands, your Austins and so forth,” said Dr. Sellen. These areas tend to house more highly educated people and have stronger social support systems for breastfeeding. In a study published in The Journal of Nutrition in 2001, Dr. Sellen reviewed data on weaning patterns from 97 modern and historical non-industrialized cultures and found that while specifics varied widely — early-20th-century Tibetans weaned between 10 and 12 months, for instance, while the Native American Arapaho of the late 1930s nursed for four years or longer — mothers, on average, stopped nursing when their babies were around 2.5. But to better understand why humans wean at the times we do, it’s helpful to look to ancient humans and our nonhuman primate relatives, which can give us clues, “potentially, into the whole arc of our development,” said Tanya Smith, Ph.D., a biological anthropologist at Griffith University in Australia. In the past decade or so, researchers have learned more about other species’ weaning ages by analyzing the chemical signature of nursing in their teeth. Growing humans and other animals lay down dental tissues in fine layers each day, like tree rings, starting before birth. These layers hold a precise record of our milk (or formula) consumption. In one study published in 2017, Dr. Smith and her colleagues analyzed the teeth of wild orangutans, whose treetop nursing is hard to observe, and found that the apes fed their young milk for eight years or more. Chimpanzees — our closest living relatives — don’t finish weaning until their young are around 4 or 5. But while apes seem to nurse for longer than human babies, Neanderthals (our extinct cousins) may have weaned more like modern humans. In a 2018 study of a Neanderthal tooth, for instance, Dr. Smith and her colleagues found evidence of gradual weaning at age 2.5. In other words, weaning when we do may have been an important step in human evolution. There isn’t one right time to wean We had dabbled in baby sign language starting around 9 months, and my daughter’s first — and favorite — sign was “milk.” Embarrassingly, the sign for milk is to squeeze your hand as if milking a cow. At 18 months, she liked to hold a stuffed animal up to my breast, make a little smacking sound, and then say “Thank you!” By 22 months, she had learned to say “Mommy’s.” As in: Her: (Squeezy hand.) Me: “You want some milk in a cup?” Her: “No, Mommy’s.” (Diving inside my shirt.) Were things getting weird? A little. Meredith Brockway, Ph.D., R.N., a nurse and postdoctoral researcher studying clinical uses of human milk at the University of Manitoba, said that my story is common. In her experience, most moms who find themselves breastfeeding into toddlerhood didn’t plan it that way. And it’s normal to feel judged for it. After the W.H.O. published its recommendation to nurse until 2 or beyond in 2003, for instance, Dr. Brockway noticed that several of her fellow public health nurses “were really put off” by the suggestion to breastfeed for that long. “Some of them said it was gross.” Bothered by such negative attitudes, Dr. Brockway set out to learn more about the stigma that is often attached to longer breastfeeding. In 2016, she and her co-author published a review of studies about the experiences of moms who breastfed past 1 year, finding that they “included stigma and secrecy.” Some mothers even hid their nursing from their partners. Dr. Brockway said she believes it should be up to each mother and baby to negotiate a time to wean. Biologically speaking, there isn’t one right weaning age for everyone, said Katie Hinde, Ph.D., an evolutionary anthropologist at Arizona State University who studies lactation. In a 2015 study, Dr. Hinde and her co-authors looked for consequences of weaning at different ages. They compared 231 children in Tanzania who had nursed for two or more years with 84 children who’d stopped nursing sooner. In terms of growth and immune function, the two groups were essentially the same. While this study didn’t find any specific benefits to breastfeeding past age 2, it also didn’t conclude that it’s pointless. Perhaps there’s a hidden biological cue passing between baby and mother that encourages weaning after children have reached some developmental threshold, whatever age they are. The data only show that the choices of each mother and child in that study led them to pretty much the same outcome. The weaning advantage I didn’t want to wean my daughter before she was ready. But after her second birthday, I stopped offering my milk in the morning, to nudge things along. At 28 months, she went several days in a row without nursing at all, then asked for milk during a cranky bedtime. I let her try, but she frowned while she sucked; nothing seemed to be coming out. I told her the milk might be all gone. She sat up. “I just drank it all!” she said, looking a little stricken. Then she went to bed, and that was that. We were able to wean at a time that worked for both of us, but not all moms are so lucky. The structures of our societies make it more or less — often, less — feasible to breastfeed. Women have to work, or don’t have support from people around them. Others experience stigma for nursing toddlers or nursing in public, while still others are judged for not nursing at all. But flexibility in how we feed our babies, as Dr. Sellen’s study across cultures showed, is part of being human. And compared with our mammalian relatives, our ability to wean at relatively earlier ages might have been key to the evolution — and success — of the human race. Unlike orangutan, chimpanzee or gorilla moms, who have to do everything themselves, according to Dr. Hinde, ancient human moms got help from other people — fathers, grandmas, siblings. As we evolved to wean sooner and share child care duties, infants became less costly to their mothers. That may have meant we could have more babies. And evolutionarily speaking, more young means a more successful species. “Humans can have more babies, closer together, that survive at twice the survival rate of other wild apes,” Dr. Sellen said. Hundreds of thousands of years ago, that difference may have given our species a leg up. Today humans are the planet’s dominant ape, no matter how we feed our children. Breastfeeding may make us mammals, but weaning is part of what makes us human. At the time of pregnancy, managing your wife's emotions is a difficult thing because she needs more care and attention, if you want to learn more about it then please drop your comments in the comment section. As flu season approaches parents to need to make a decision—whether or not to get their child a flu shot. The flu isn't just a stronger version of the common cold. It's a serious illness that can often lead to a hospital stay and can even be fatal.
Lasting about a week, those who contract the flu have a wide range of symptoms including a cough, headache, runny nose, fever, and exhaustion. Complications include ear, sinus and staph infections, and pneumonia. According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, those children who live with chronic conditions like asthma and diabetes are five times more likely to be hospitalized than their healthier counterparts. Flu season typically starts in December and peaks in February, although every strain of the virus and season varies. If you dread the idea of taking your child to the doctor's office to get a flu shot and the tears, kicking, and screaming that goes along with it, think about the alternative—taking care of a very sick child, or worse, spending time at their bedside at the hospital. There are a few ways to deal with the anxiety your child may be feeling before bringing them in for a shot. Which option you choose really depends on the temperament of your child:
Shot-Time Game Plan If you do opt to get your child a shot, there are a few strategies you can employ to distract them from what the doctor or nurse is doing:
If your child really turns up the drama, it may be very frustrating and embarrassing for you. But there are some things to consider:
When it's all over, hold your child and comfort them if they need it. This might even be a good time to go out for ice cream! Bedtime does not have to be a nightmare
What is bedtime like in your house? For many parents of small children, when the clock rolls around to bedtime, even the best days start to go wrong. And if you have a child who is reluctant at bedtime, it truly does affect the whole household. Preschool-aged children (considered to be in the 3 to 5 years of age group) need about 11 to 13 hours of sleep a day (this can include naps). If your child goes to bed too late, they might not be getting the sleep that they need, leading to a host of other issues, including irritability and sleepiness during the day. And chances are if your child is not sleeping enough, you aren't either, which doesn't help anyone. While some preschoolers are super-cooperative when it is time to lay down under the covers, there are many more who are not so accommodating. And of course, everyone has a bad night once in a while. But bedtime doesn't have to always be a battle. With a few parent-tested and approved tips and tricks, you'll all be sleeping soundly (in your own beds) in no time. Check out these bedtime hacks for a good night's sleep for the whole family. 1. Give Kids a Choice Young children like to be in control, but obviously, they need limits as well. So appeal to your child's sense of needing to be in charge by offering up some choices at bedtime. Keep in mind though, when you offer a choice to your child, be sure to offer up options that you will be happy with, no matter what your child chooses. For example, if you ask, how many books at bedtime, don't give the answers as four, five, or six if you aren't willing to read that many. You don't want to go back on your promise, as that will just cause frustration for everyone. Try some of these options and see which work best for your family:
When getting input from your preschooler, the key word here is choice. Be sure to give a few (or two) options and not leave the question open-ended, because then you will get answers such as "I want to read 100 books!" or "I want to go to bed at midnight!" 2. Pick Up Some Blackout Curtains Whenever daylight savings time rolls around, I have the same battle over and over again with my little one. His bedtime is 7:30. But at 7:30 during the summer months, it isn't even close to being dark outside. So how do I resolve his need to sleep when it looks like nighttime, against my need for him to sleep during actual nighttime? Blackout curtains do a great job of making the room totally dark, whether it is still too light at bedtime or a little too light very early in the morning. Fair warning though: blackout curtains can make the room quite dark, so be sure to have a night light ready if you think the darkness will be too much for your little one. 3. Introduce Some Soothing Scents Lavender and chamomile are wonderful when it comes to helping people relax. While using essential oils is heralded by many, you must be careful when applying them to young children. Instead, try products that release the scents into your child's room, including sprays, and diffusers (being very careful to follow all directions). You can also use these scents in the Go Away Spray (see number 5) or in soap or body wash form (see number 8). 4. Use a Weighted Blanket Weighted blankets have long been heralded by parents of children with special needs as being super-helpful at bedtime. They offer comfort to children who have sensory disorders, who are affected by autism spectrum disorder, or who in other ways have special needs. But others are finding their benefits too. These blankets apply a slight amount of extra pressure across a person's entire body, relaxing the body and induce a feeling of calm. 5. Make Your Own Go Away Spray For kids who have nightmares, fears of the dark, or fears of the unknowns in the dark, a little comfort can go a long way. "Go Away Sprays" encourage kids to spray away their worries, whether it is a monster under the bed or an unknown in their closet. They can be purchased, or you can make your own. Simply fill a spray bottle or mister with water and add a scent, whether it is an essential oil or a perfume or cologne that your child likes. Have the child decorate the bottle any way they choose. Something to consider, however: Rather than use a "Go Away Spray," think about using something more positive, such as Brave Potion or Courage Spray. Go Away Spray may actually confirm for your child that there is something in the room to be scared of, while the alternatives empower little ones to be brave. 6. Play Soothing Music Lullabies have been a go-to for parents of babies years, and with good reason. So why not continue the practice as your child gets older? While there is no real medical evidence that they can help a child sleep, they are certainly are soothing and calming and go a long way to setting a relaxed tone at bedtime. Make sure the music is loud enough that your child can hear it but soft enough so it doesn't interfere with your child falling asleep. A bonus: If you choose the same soundtrack every night, eventually your child will associate that music with bedtime and most likely relax much faster. 7. Try Some Basic Yoga or Stretching Yoga before bed can be beneficial to everyone! You don't have to get into a whole, full-blown routine. Simple stretches such as downward dog or cobra will relax kids' muscles and get them into a sleepy state of mind. Play relaxing sounds, such as rain or a waterfall to add to the serene scene. As well as with yoga, you must focused on your Kids nutrition and ensures a well balanced combination of protein, calcium, iron and the B vitamins in their diet. 8. Give a Bath or Shower Many people like to bathe or shower in the morning because it helps wake you up. But it can also help you relax before bed. Giving a child a bath or a shower at night has a few purposes: it cleans your child after a long day of running, jumping, climbing, playing, and whatever else that has caused your child to be messy and/or dirty. But, a bath or a shower also stops the day in its tracks. It's a transition from day to night, from clothing to pajamas (which are also an indicator to your child that it's time to settle down). 9. How About a Little Snuggle? For some children, bedtime is hard because they don't want to separate from mom, dad, or their caregiver. So take some time out to relax together. This should be separate from reading a bedtime story (which also is a great way to help a child wind down!). Turn off all the lights, put away the screens, get under the blankets and just cuddle. You can talk about your day or just sit in (blissful) silence. The one thing to watch out for here is that you don't get into the habit of letting your child fall asleep while you are still there because that can lead to other issues. But still, a few minutes of dark, quiet calm will be beneficial to you both. 10. Start a Reward Chart For kids who need a little extra incentive, consider a reward system of some kind. A positive form of discipline, reward systems are a way of praising good behavior while encouraging it to continue. So, for example, if you have a child who has difficulty staying in bed, you might create a sticker chart (beans in a jar work well too) documenting every night that your child stays in bed without getting up. This really applies for the next day where you can praise your child for a job well done (or talk about what went wrong and how they need to try harder), so it's important that you catch your child not too long after they wake up. Reward systems work best when the praise is immediate. Depending on what type of system you use, you may want to give your child a bigger reward depending on what they accomplish. For example, ten nights in a row where the child stays in bed might equate to a trip to the ice cream shop or a treat from the dollar store. If you are a parent, you know that just about every decision you make is up for debate. (They don't call them the mommy wars for nothing!) And no parenting method seems to come under fire more than spanking children as a form of discipline. Whatever you think of spanking, whether you were spanked as a child or whether you spank your own kids, whenever you are deciding which discipline method to employ, it's important to make sure it is the most effective one to implement. So what of spanking children? Does it work? Advocates say that giving a child a smack on the bottom sends a strong message and will curtail any future infractions on the part of the child. Opponents say that it borders on child abuse and that it really doesn't work. Which is right? While it is a personal decision and one that should be made depending on what works best for your family, there are important factors to consider. Why Parents Spank Their Children For some parents, spanking is a natural form of discipline—perhaps they were spanked as a child themselves. Others see it as a good punishment when a child is about to get hurt or finds themselves in a dangerous situation (running across a parking lot or into a street perhaps). Still, others use spanking as a last resort when no other discipline methods have worked. Sometimes spanking happens when a parent simply gets angry, reacts to what a child has just done and spanks in order to send a strong message in the hopes that the child will not engage in that behavior again. Problems with Spanking Children While spanking supporters say the method works well, the reality is that all it teaches the child is to behave and "be good" – not necessarily to understand why they should conduct themselves in a certain way. For example, if a child moves to touch a hot stove and is spanked, the child will most likely learn not to touch the stove anymore. However, what they won't learn is why they shouldn't touch a stove. When a child is spanked in that situation, a teaching opportunity is lost -- a chance to review kitchen safety. Spanking puts a stop to a behavior but it doesn't encourage a child to make decisions or wonder why a certain decision isn't a good one. Spanking also models aggressive behavior. Even though the child is being hit in the context of being disciplined, it is still happening while the grown-up is angry, so it demonstrates to a young child that it's OK to hit someone when you are mad. As a parent, you are your child's best role model. Even if you tell your child that they shouldn't hit someone, by hitting your child, you are demonstrating that that action is acceptable. It's also important to consider that as a child gets older, they are likely to get angry at their parent for spanking them. Instead of thinking about what they have done to warrant a spanking, the child focuses on the punishment, rather than what they are being punished for. The American Academy of Pediatrics (APA) has a very strong opinion on spanking children—they are against it. In the seventh edition of Caring for Your Baby and Young Child: Birth to Age 5, the APA states:1 "The American Academy of Pediatrics strongly opposes striking a child for any reason. If a spanking is spontaneous, parents should later explain calmly why they did it, the specific behavior that provoked it, and how angry they felt. They also might apologize to their child for their loss of control. This usually helps the youngster to understand and accept the spanking, and it models for the child how to remediate a wrong." Alternatives to Spanking There are many other ways to discipline a child other than spanking them. Time-outs and taking away something that is valuable to the child are both really effective in teaching a child the difference between right and wrong. Another technique is redirection which allows you to let your child know that the way that they are acting is not acceptable, while also providing a positive alternative. The key to disciplining a child isn't just to get them to stop doing something (although that is certainly important). Discipline should also be viewed as a learning opportunity – a chance for a child to learn from her mistakes while developing good decision-making skills that she can utilize in the future. With money management guide, your child learn about the money and its value. Is there anything nicer or more pleasant than coming across a child who is polite and who uses kind words? One that says "please" and "thank you" without being prompted — maybe she even asks to be excused from the dinner table (and brings her plate with her when she goes!). He's one that every parent wants to invite over to have a playdate for their child with and the girl whose parents you always offer to carpool with.
Believe it or not, your preschooler can be that child. Yes, really! Although it may seem like a near-impossible task, teaching manners and kind words to children doesn't have to be a stressful endeavor. With a little time, patience and some good grooming of your own, you'll soon have a child that will be advising Miss Manners. Here's how: Getting Started The key to teaching politeness and kind words is to start small, start early and be consistent — in your own behavior. You are your child's first and most important role model. If your 3-year-old hears you saying, "Please pass the potatoes," or "Thank you for the wonderful gift!" on a regular basis to a variety of different people — themselves, friends, family and strangers alike — then it's very likely that she will follow suit on her own accord. (And realize that this is true for teaching manners to children and any life behavior that you'd like your child to follow.) Especially important is that you speak to your child using good manners. Your child is going to mirror you. And your child also deserves your respect. When you speak to your child politely and kindly, they will model your behavior. But even with you pledging to be on your best behavior on a regular basis, there does need to be some teaching and explaining involved — manners can't be learned strictly by osmosis. Start at home and with the daily interactions that you and your child have each day. In any instance where manners should be used — the dinner table, any social exchange, even in pretend play with dolls or trucks — use manners and point out to the little one that you are doing so. Encourage him to follow suit. Continue on the Path of Manners As she gets comfortable with these new words in her vocabulary, you can start encouraging her to use them in social situations. Even a young preschooler can comprehend that after someone gives them something, "thank you" needs to be the automatic response back to the giver, whether they are receiving a birthday present at a party or a juice box from the refrigerator at snack time. Certainly, you should teach your child to say "thank you" in any situation that it is appropriate, but to start, showing appreciation for a gift is probably the easiest and most natural social setting for them. Explain to your child that saying "thank you" is a way to tell a person that you are thankful and grateful for what they have done or given. To explain the word please to your little one, talk about how it's an important word that tells people that you need help — either doing something or needing something and by using it, people are more likely to lend a hand. If your child seems to understand and is consistently using "please," and "thank you," you can start with "you're welcome" and "excuse me." An important part of teaching your child manners is to heap on the praise when they use the correct word or phrase and to not necessarily scold them if they don't. Simply point out that they need to use the appropriate word and move on. Continue teaching by example. They'll catch on soon enough. The reality is, most kids won't be able to purposefully use kind words by the time they are four. They may say the words, but not necessarily understand the meaning behind them. That's OK. The important thing is that you've started. You can get all the knowledge about economics for kids and can easily teach your kids about financial management and how to manage their money in future.. It can be fun to buy kids gifts. And it can feel good to give them the things that you weren't able to have as a kid.
Over-the-top birthday parties, lavish vacations, piles of electronics, and constant entertainment sounds like a great childhood on the surface. But giving kids too many possessions, too many privileges, and too many opportunities can actually be bad for them. In fact, in some cases, overindulging children actually constitutes neglect and it can have lifelong consequences for many children. Types of Overindulgence Overindulging children isn't just about buying lots of holiday gifts. It can also involve giving kids too much freedom and too little discipline. Researchers at the Overindulgence Project have identified three types of overindulgence:
Reasons Parents Overindulge Kids There are many reasons why parents overindulge kids. The most common reason is guilt. A parent who works long hours may not want to enforce chores when he arrives home from work. Or, a non-custodial parent may try to compensate for not being around by buying a child lots of gifts. Another common reason is that parents want kids to be “happy.” So rather than say no and risk upsetting their children, they give in and let them have whatever they want. Sometimes parents are just ill-equipped and unprepared to deal with behavior problems. They don’t know how to respond to temper tantrums and defiance. So to make life easier in the short-term, they go to great lengths to avoid disciplining their children. Finally, some parents want to make up for their bad childhood experiences. A parent who grew up in poverty may want to make sure their child doesn’t “go without.” Or a parent who grew up with really strict parents may go to the other extreme and not give a child enough structure. Why Overindulging Children Isn’t Healthy Here are a few reasons why you may want to think twice about giving your child everything he wants:
Put a Stop to Overindulgence If you’re guilty of overindulging your child, choose to create positive change in your family. Commit to putting a stop to unhealthy behaviors that are harmful to your child. When you start saying no, and stop overindulging your child, you’re likely to see increased behavior problems. Your child will likely retaliate and do everything in his power to undermine your efforts. But if you become more authoritative, you’ll teach your child the valuable life skills he needs to become a responsible adult. Learn from parenting blogs that how you can handle the behavior problems. Many parents feel guilty about committing the “sins” that afflict nearly all mothers and fathers. But feeling guilty has consequences related to the emotional health of parents and children's general wellbeing. Guilt may lead parents to develop unhealthy discipline habits, like giving in to children when it's not in their best interest or overcompensating for the choices they make. While those things may temporarily relieve a parent's guilt, those responses could be unhealthy for children.
Assuage your guilt by understanding that no parent is perfect and, sometimes, you do what you must to get through the day. Here are the top seven reasons parents feel guilty and tips for ways to deal with those feelings. 1. I'm a Working Parent For parents who work outside the home, this is likely the top source of guilt—you feel guilty that you like your job, you feel guilty that you need your salary (and even guiltier if you don’t need the money!), and you definitely feel guilty that going to work can sometimes feel like a respite from the chaotic environment at home. Research shows that children’s language, social and cognitive skills can be benefited by attending a quality daycare. If going to work makes you happy, that provides a world of benefit for the entire family. Do you feel even worse when you pick up your little one from daycare and head home, only to leave him with a babysitter so you can have a date night with your spouse or attend a board meeting for a charity you really care about? Your life matters, too, whether it’s maintaining your relationship or fulfilling yourself mentally by taking a break via volunteering, shopping or otherwise. In fact, as your child grows up, it’s good for him to see that you take care of your needs, too. Plus, he probably loves playing with the babysitter! 2. My Child Misbehaves in Public All parents have felt embarrassed when a child throws a temper tantrum in the grocery store or becomes the worst acting kid at the playground. Those looks you’re getting are more likely a sign of sympathy than one of judgment. However, you can change your discipline strategies a little bit to help address this situation. First, if you think your child is old enough to understand, set your expectations for behavior in advance. Ensure that he knows the consequences of misbehaving, and actually enforce them if you run into a behavioral mishap. Avoid taking your child on an outing when he’s due for a nap if at all possible. Meltdowns are more likely when your child is overtired. It’s hard to change your own plans to work around your kids’ schedule, but it makes life easier overall. Plan ahead by packing snacks, juice, a change of clothes and a distracting toy. Sometimes, kids misbehave in public because they know it’s embarrassing for their caregivers and they think they’ll be more likely to get what they want. When your child breaks the rules, follow through with an effective consequence. 3. My Child's Diet Is Awful One day, your baby is happily scarfing down beets, broccoli, and sweet potatoes; the next, your toddler refuses to eat anything except peanut butter sandwiches, goldfish, and lollipops. It’s best not to make the dinner table a battleground over food; simply keep offering your child a wide variety of nutritious items. Don’t make a big deal about it if she refuses to eat those fruits and veggies—after all, no child died from boycotting Brussels sprouts. Eventually, she might surprise you by trying (and loving!) food that she previously rejected. If your issue is that your child eats too much junk food or fast food, remember that it’s not poisonous! But, it should be a treat rather than a daily occurrence. Alleviate some guilt by doing research on what the healthier items are at the drive-thru. Or, do some research on what types of meals you can serve at home that are fast, but healthy. As with so many other things in life, the key is moderation. 4. My Child Enjoys Too Much Screen Time If you listen to some experts, electronics are the source of all evil—it contributes to obesity, ADHD and a plethora of other problems. Of course, there’s truth to that, but it’s also sometimes a necessary evil. It’s all about balance. If your child is watching TV every day for many hours in a row, then it’s time to cut back. If he plays on his tablet for an hour each evening and he watches a movie on the weekends, that’s moderate viewing. Make sure your child has plenty of other activities he enjoys. Running around outside, building with blocks, or doing chores all have mental and physical health benefits. You can also make screen time a worthwhile activity by snuggling up next to your child and using the show or movie as a launching point for education or activities. Ask questions about what’s going on, apply it to real life or ask them to count objects or colors on the screen. In other words, make screen time interactive and educational. 5. I Yell Too Much Even the most laid-back parents snap sometimes and yell at their child once in a while. And sometimes yelling is warranted. If your child chases a ball into the street, don’t worry about your tone of voice. Yell out a reminder to get back to the sidewalk before he gets run over. However, if yelling is becoming the status quo, consider if your stress levels are high or if you need help managing your anger. Or perhaps, you need help finding more effective discipline techniques. A licensed therapist can help you sort out why you can’t seem to maintain patience with your children—and help you find ways to keep your cool. That’s important because yelling at kids can be harmful to their mental health. 6. I Can't Afford to Give My Child Any Extras Between music classes, gymnastic lessons, soccer teams and all the gadgets that kids seem to have these days, raising a child have gotten more expensive than it’s ever been in the past. Despite all those expenses, you’ll likely see your child’s friends vacationing in Disney World and playing the latest video game while your child is playing in the backyard and wearing hand-me-downs. But, really, the bells and whistles aren’t necessary for childhood. In fact, offering too much stuff is problematic. If your child is constantly overindulged, he might grow up to become materialistic. Sending your child outside to play (without the latest toys) encourages imagination, which is what’s really important. Add your own imagination by creating nearly free toys, such as building a boat out of a cardboard box, or turning a sheet into a superhero’s cape. Avoid sending a message that tells your child it’s unfortunate that you don’t have as much money as other people. Teach him to be grateful for what he has and focus on spending quality time together. 7. I Can't Do It All Who says you need to? This form of guilt is typically self-imposed by parents who think that they have to be a superhero parent, plus a super-employee, super-friend, super-housekeeper and super-everything-else-possible. While it’s important to live a balanced life, a work-life balance doesn’t mean everything needs to be fair and equal. There may be times when you have to focus more on your career and times when your family needs you more than usual. Be willing to ask for help. And be willing to accept help when it’s offered. If you have the funds, hire a cleaning service or a food delivery service once in a while. Say no to social obligations occasionally. Allow your child to watch TV when you need a break. You should teach your kids by taking help from Point-system for kids which would help you to develop a healthy and happy child. What does it mean to be perfect when it comes to parenting?
Parenting isn’t one single line you walk and neither is the strive for perfection in parenting. On some days, being a perfect parent means taking extra care with the food you prepare. On others, it’s a desire for a spotless house. On still other days, it’s the amount of playtime you engage in. And on some days, it’s an overwhelming desire to be amazing at all things, all the time. Letting go of perfectionism is an important skill that can only improve your confidence in parenting. Pitfalls of Perfectionism in ParentingDoes it even matter if we add a little perfection in our parenting? What can it hurt if I teach my kids that a clean house is a matter of pride and importance? While values and responsibility are wonderful, going over the line into striving for perfection can really take a toll on you and your family. The quest for perfect will rob you of any joy the moment holds. By searching for perfect you miss the good. How to Reduce Perfectionism
A couple of months ago I was laying in bed. Awake after not quite enough sleep. I wasn’t ready to get up.
My brain started turning over the kind of stuff brains turn over when it’s way too early in the morning. The stuff that makes it really hard to go back to sleep. I finally stumbled upon a parenting issue that’s been just under the surface. The way I talk with my kids is changing. We’re at the end the tween stage for one and the beginning of teen stage for the other. I know how to talk to kids. It’s one of my parenting strengths. But as they get older, how I talk to them is changing. Sometimes I feel good about the changes… sometimes I wonder if there’s a better way. Suddenly a parenting book title flashed in my mind. It was one I’d seen mentioned a lot, but I’d never read. I grabbed my phone, scrolled to Scribd (my very favorite way to listen to audio books) and quickly found the book I was looking for. After saving that title for later… I rolled over and was back to sleep in no time. It turned out to be just what I needed, right when I needed it. I want to help match you with the parenting book you need right now. This is the first post in a series of parenting book reviews. Over the next few months, I’ll be reading through and reporting on parenting books. What to Take AwayThere are so many things that can be taken away from How To Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk. Here are some of my favorites:
Here’s my example from this book: One piece of advice stuck out to me. “Don’t ask your kids if they had fun.” The reason behind avoiding this question is that it puts extra pressure on the kids. Did they need to have fun? What if they didn’t have fun? This idea made sense to me, so I immediately started watching for this question. I quickly realized I ask this question A LOT. I went to work to eliminate this from my conversations. It was hard. Harder, then it should have been. Then I started feeling really bad and second-guessing all of our conversations. I had taken one small token from this book and put so much stake in it that I didn’t see all the good that was coming from the other great information. I stopped. Took a few minutes to examine the actual situation in our house, in our conversations and in our relationship. This question is not hurting us. I am getting a solid reaction and the kids will tell me if they didn’t have fun. There are plenty of techniques I can take from this book that will improve our ability to communicate. This is not one of them. I can let it go You should teach your kids by taking help from Point-system for kids which would help you to develop a healthy and happy child. I was recently asked for tips on naptime.
It made sense that this desperate Mom would ask me. We’ve had a solid bedtime routine for years. It’s safe to assume I have figured out all sleep issues. But when she asked, I paused. I didn’t have an answer. My mind flipped quickly through years of naptime at our house. It wasn’t good. Closer to horrible. In fact, I’m not really excited to share any of our naptime experiences. I’m exhausted just thinking about how I sat outside the bedroom door. Giving my EXTREMELY ACTIVE son no choice but to stay inside the room and myself the chance to be not moving. I can still feel the tension caused by the daily battle between his desire to continue exploring and my need to sit still… just for a few minutes. I cringe at the “end of my rope” parenting choices I made. Always regretting them immediately. So no, I don’t have advice on naptime. You’ll have to go somewhere else for that. This conversation did stir up some different parenting thoughts. Something that might be just as important as naptime. (Is anything as important as naptime? Probably not.) You see, I’m a fixer. I like finding solutions. Looking hard at problems until they become crystal clear. Trying out different ideas until something works. I like the entire process. I also like having an answer and a solved problem. When I looked back at naptime and found a problem that was never solved, I was struck with an interesting thought… It didn’t matter that we never figured it out. We made it through. We learned a lot from that experience (even if it wasn’t how to actually make naps happen). He is now an awesome early teen. Whether or not he laid down without a battle for naps is no longer relevant. These battles didn’t create a defiant child. My inability to solve this naptime problem didn’t put a strain on our relationship. We made it through and that is the only thing that matters. 3 Steps to Take When You Find an Unsolvable ProblemI love to be inspired. I especially love to be inspired and directed. If reading the story above gave you peace and a little room to breathe. Great! Let it sit with you for a bit and then move on to changing up your parenting mindset shift. However, if you’re like me, after reading an inspiring story you want more. Okay, I’m moved… what do I do with this new insight?
At the time of pregnancy, managing your wife's emotions is a difficult thing because she needs more care and attention, if you want to learn more about it then please drop your comments in the comment section. You don’t have to let go of the optimism. As parents, teachers and tutors, we have some concrete advice for staving off the tears — for both parents and children. Regardless of a child’s age or challenges, parents can encourage sound homework routines for a successful start to the school year. First, students should consider how to create organized work spaces, backpacks and lockers cleared of clutter and systematized for easy retrieval of important assignments. Second, nightly to-do checklists are a must to help prioritize and plan ahead. But many students still struggle when it comes to homework. Their stress tends to be exacerbated by three primary challenges: procrastinating, feeling overwhelmed and struggling to retain information. Ideally, parents can help elementary school children develop effective homework habits so they will not need as much guidance as they get older. Parents who are not home during their kids’ prime homework hours can try out some of these ideas on the weekends and pass along the best practices to their caregivers. For Procrastination Reduce potential distractions. Many students finish reading a sentence, and then refresh their Instagram feed. Ideally, their phones should be nowhere near them during homework time. Or they should disable or mute apps and texting functions on the phone and computer while they work. We know this will mean a grumpy adolescent. But it’s a battle worth fighting. Establish a family tech-space where phones and laptops go when not in use. And model these boundaries by leaving your devices there, too! Remember that consistency is key. Kids ultimately thrive in the comfort and reliability of a structured approach to homework, so each afternoon they should follow the same steps in roughly the same order. For Students Overwhelmed by Workload Plan ahead. It might be helpful for you to model the planning process, so your kids can see how you schedule a series of tasks. Try to make a point of letting them in on the process when you’re running errands, preparing for a trip or completing a project for work. Then take advantage of some set time (Sunday tends to work best) to plan the coming week. Students should break down large assignments into more manageable chunks and then backplan from the due date, recording on a calendar what they’ll need to do when in order to complete each major task and its components. In the early grades, this could mean reading a book by Tuesday in order to write a book report on Wednesday. By middle school, it could translate to finishing the research for a science project with enough time to make a compelling poster to display at the science fair. The more practice students get with planning, the sooner they’ll become self-sufficient. Use time estimates. Students should estimate how long each assignment will take and develop a schedule accordingly. Even if the estimate is wrong, the process of thinking through timing will allow them to internalize how best to proceed when juggling multiple tasks. It will give them a better gauge of how long future assignments will take and make the evening ahead less intimidating. Begin with the most difficult task. Most kids’ instinct will be to complete the fun or easy to-dos first. But they should start with the hardest work. Otherwise it will be later when, energy depleted, they begin trying to outline their term paper. Encouraging them to do the most challenging work first will allow them to devote attention and energy to the demanding assignments — then they can coast through the easy tasks. For Students Who Struggle to Retain Information Use a cumulative approach. Memorize information in stages that build upon one another. When students are confronted with vast swaths of material, it can be overwhelming and difficult to recall. Suggest that they break it up into a series of discrete parts based on the number of topics and the number of days they have to study for the test. For example, students might divide a history test study sheet into sections 1 to 3. The first day should be for studying section 1. The second day, section 2. The third day, reviewing sections 1 and 2, before moving to section 3 the following day. This way, by the time students get to section 3, they haven’t forgotten what they learned in the first section. This cumulative approach reinforces retention of content through review and repetition. Summarize with concise lists, identify keywords and use mnemonics. A big block of text on a study sheet can be difficult for students to absorb and memorize. Instead, they should break the sentence or paragraph up into a series of points, highlighting the keywords and then creating their own mnemonic device to remember it. Sometimes the silliest mnemonics stick the best, and remembering the first letters of words will help trigger ideas that they might otherwise forget. Employ visual aids and narratives. Some students can best synthesize information by creating charts or other graphic organizers. Rather than feeling overwhelmed by writing several paragraphs with important information about how a cell works, for example, students might present the same data in streamlined form with a chart. Charts distill and organize numerous sources (parts of a cell) according to the same set of criteria (form, function, location), creating a categorized snapshot that’s easier to memorize. Other students prefer narratives that link ideas to their context. Instead of trying to memorize various inventors, students could recall how they built on one another’s accomplishments. Most students thrive when both these approaches are used simultaneously. Make study materials. We know it’s old-fashioned, but writing out information helps commit content to memory far better than typing it. If writing out the material longhand is too onerous, kids should still create their own study sheet digitally, rather than borrowing one from a friend. The work of creating the study sheet is a crucial step in internalizing its content. Active is always better than passive studying. Most students benefit from being orally quizzed on the material so they can determine both the information they know inside-out, and what they still need to review. Online resources like Quizlet can work well to prepare for straightforward vocabulary quizzes, but is less helpful when it comes to tests covering more complex information. Most importantly, students should generate their own study material to make the most of using Quizlet, rather than relying on pre-existing content that others have posted. How Much Studying Is Enough? Some kids believe they’ll never be prepared, even after hours of studying. Others barely crack a book open and declare they’re done. Use practice tests. The best way to know that study time is over is when students are able to perform the task that will be asked of them on the in-class test, quiz or essay. Initially, children can review the material orally. They should write down any material they missed to help commit it to memory. Then, they can take a sample test from a textbook, or create a mock test with class notes, homework and study guides. When students demonstrate a verbal and written command of the information, studying should be complete. Talk through these study habits now, so that on the first day of school, your child will not only have the requisite sharpened pencils, but also a plan of action. At the time of pregnancy, managing your wife's emotions is a difficult thing because she needs more care and attention, if you want to learn more about it then please drop your comments in the comment section. After a meeting at my twins’ high school, I encountered a mountain of water bottles, sweatshirts, jackets, lunch totes and more in that lost and found pile. Every year, families outfit kids with new back-to-school clothes and gear. How can we help make sure our kids bring it all back from school? “It is important for educators and parents to understand that the areas of the brain related to executive functioning do not mature until a person is in their mid-20s,” said Dr. Mark Bertin, a developmental behavioral pediatrician in Pleasantville, N.Y. Adults tend to expect high school students to show a certain level of responsibility that demands executive functioning skills such as planning, organization and memory, which may be developmentally challenging for some. Teenagers with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder tend to struggle with executive function, but experts say the strategies intended for them can help other kids steer clear of the lost and found — with or without a diagnosis. Dr. Bertin, author of “Mindful Parenting for A.D.H.D.,” explained that executive functioning is a developmental path like language that starts in early childhood and changes over time. “The part of the brain that has to do with managing life is the one that matures last,” he said. “Often there is a perception that teens need to figure things out completely on their own, but executive functioning is like other skills, and sometimes adults need to help teens learn that skill,” Dr. Bertin said. Take Ownership Before implementing a plan, your child must want to participate or any solutions will be ineffective. “When teens create their own system, then they are invested in that system and more likely to use it,” said Susan C. Pinsky, a professional organizer in Acton, Mass., and author of “Organizing Solutions for People With A.D.H.D.” Dr. Bertin suggested that parents should give teenagers a chance to come up with their own routines and intervene only if there is a recurring problem. “If you don’t want to fight about it but you want to reinforce a routine, you can still use reward programs,” Dr. Bertin said. Pay Attention“Teens need to pay attention,” said Krystal L. Culler, associate executive director of Memory Matters in Hilton Head Island, S.C. “This may sound simple, but it is the crucial first step to memory. If you are not paying attention to where you placed an object, then your brain doesn’t process the information to store within your memory.” Dr. Damon Korb, a developmental behavioral pediatrician in Los Gatos, Calif., and author of “Raising an Organized Child,” said, “Often the problem is that the information never gets registered in the first place.” Research shows that one way to pay attention is to avoid multitasking. Our brains lack the ability to do two or more tasks at the same time. “Mistakes are more likely to occur when our mind is busy thinking of something else,” said Simona Ghetti, a professor at the University of California, Davis, Center for Mind and Brain. “If you put your jacket down while you are talking with your friends, then it might be hard to remember where you put it.” Create Routines and Habits“If you give everything a place you don’t lose it,” Dr. Korb said. “When I was younger, I used to lose my car keys all the time. Then I got married and my wife put a basket by the door for my car keys and I never lost them again.” Forming routines and habits will help teenagers keep track of their belongings and reduce memory “glitches.” By developing the habit of scanning your desk area, you would notice the water bottle you left behind. “If you are thinking about the text message you just got, it might be hard to remember to bring everything you need for school that day,” Dr. Ghetti said. Dr. Korb said that if teenagers develop a mantra when they leave a classroom, they won’t lose things. “When the bell rings teens should ask themselves, ‘Is my notebook in my backpack? Do I have my water bottle? Is my pencil put away?’” Ms. Pinsky recommended using a mnemonic for items you need when leaving the house or school. She offered the example of singing the items to the tune of the song, “head, shoulders, knees and toes,” such as “glasses, wallet, keys and phone, keys and phone.” Get Organized: When people are organized, they are less likely to lose items. The beginning of the school year is a perfect time for teens to create organizational systems for their backpack, locker and room. “Teens lose things because they have too much stuff, too many commitments, overcomplicated systems and a lack of routine,” said Ms. Pinsky. She recommended first decluttering and then using simple organizational systems. “Teens should use only one binder with pockets on the front and back and dividers with pockets, so they can easily slip in papers,” she said. “It is difficult to keep track of multiple binders.” Use Color: If your teenager commonly misplaces water bottles, try using a water bottle in a favorite bright color. Research supports the use of color to help with attention, and if the bottle does get lost its color may make it easier to identify in the lost and found. When to Help Your Teen? What happens when a teenager forgets items at home and asks a parent to bring it to school? “I think it depends on where your kid is developmentally,” Dr. Bertin said. “By experiencing natural consequences, some kids might be able to develop a better plan. But for other kids it has nothing to do with not caring but with not knowing how to organize,” he said. “If a teen with A.D.H.D. repeatedly forgets their homework and the teacher lowers their grades without offering a solution to help them remember, then that teacher is punishing the student for having A.D.H.D.,” said Dr. Bertin. “The lower grade isn’t going to help them be less forgetful, since that is part of their A.D.H.D.” But others say teenagers do need to learn to face consequences for their forgetfulness, and that rescuing them will only foster dependency. “When parents are responsible for remembering everything for their kids, then our kids don’t exercise that muscle and they become forgetful,” Dr. Korb said. “The problem with bringing forgotten items to school, especially if a child has a chronic problem with organization and time management, is that each forgotten assignment is an opportunity for learning and communication with teachers who can be invaluable in helping kids come up with their own strategies for doing better next time,” said Jessica Lahey, author of “The Gift of Failure: How the Best Parents Learn to Let Go So Their Children Can Succeed.” “In the end,” she said, “that should be our goal: helping kids come up with strategies for doing better, and being better, next time.” You can get all the knowledge about economics for kids and can easily teach your kids about financial management and how to manage their money in future. MADRID — At least 17 children in Spain developed a form of “werewolf syndrome” after they were given medication intended to treat heartburn that was actually used to stop hair loss.
The children who took the mislabeled medicine, some of them babies, began growing hair all over their bodies, a rare condition known as hypertrichosis, Spain’s health minister said on Wednesday. The minister, María Luisa Carcedo, said that a Spanish laboratory, Farmaquimica Sur, had erroneously distributed to pharmacists minoxidil, a drug that helps fight baldness, that was labeled omeprazole, a drug that treats acid reflux. The pharmaceutical company, which is based in the southern city of Málaga, got its supplies of omeprazole from India, according to health inspectors quoted by local news outlets. But there is no evidence that the problem originated there or that it went beyond the mislabeling that occurred in Spain. The laboratory was eventually shut down and the medicine taken off the market. Officials have opened an investigation. Ms. Carcedo, the health minister, told reporters that no pharmacy in Spain still had the mislabeled omeprazole. “We have immobilized all the batches,” she said. A Farmaquimica Sur employee reached by phone, who declined to give her name, said that company executives were meeting with lawyers to review the situation. The company did not give details about how the medicine was mislabeled. The heartburn medicine is normally prepared by a pharmacist, who mixes compounds that are distributed in bulk. The Health Ministry said that 17 children affected so far were in three regions of the country: Cantabria in the north, Andalusia in the south and Valencia in the east. The public prosecutor of Cantabria has opened an investigation, and some families there have filed criminal lawsuits against Farmaquimica Sur. The Spanish dermatology association said that the unwanted hair should start to fall out about three months after the children stop taking the drug. But the mother of a 26-month-old girl told El Mundo that even though her daughter had stopped taking the medicine in May, the girl was still covered in unwanted hair. The woman, who was identified only by her first name, Amaya, said she had taken the infant to a doctor because she started growing hair on her face, which then spread to other parts of her body. The woman said her daughter had been given about seven milliliters of a syrup thought to be omeprazole. For minoxidil, the recommended dose is about two milliliters a day. The drug was developed to help reduce hypertension, but has also been used to treat baldness since the 1980s. The mother told El Mundo that she believed that the Spanish authorities were minimizing the importance of the health scandal. “Thank God that the symptom was as noticeable as excess hair,” she said. “If it had been a latent thing that was gradually affecting internal organs, she would have certainly continued to take” the wrong medicine. As well as with yoga and exercise, you must focused on your Kids nutrition and ensures a well balanced combination of protein, calcium, iron and the B vitamins in their diet. We have a childhood obesity problem, but there are also problems with encouraging children to lose weight.
Earlier this month when Weight Watchers put out its new Kurbo app, designed for children ages 8 through 17, there was an outcry across social media arguing that weight loss programs for children can lead to eating disorders, low self-esteem and yo-yo weight cycling. Critics expressed concern about the harm to children from “fat-shaming.” Some, including in this newspaper, said that weight loss plans for children never work. So it’s not really about the new app; it’s about what you say to children who are gaining weight too fast as they grow. Dr. Elsie Taveras, the division chief of general academic pediatrics at Massachusetts General Hospital and a specialist in childhood obesity, warned against a “none of this works” approach, asking, “What are we supposed to do with this large number of children who not just have obesity but severe obesity and its associated chronic diseases — do we not think that some changes in their nutrition are warranted? Wouldn’t you call that unethical to not offer treatment and support?” If you happen to be a pediatrician who is faced, day after day, with children’s bodies in an exam room, you have watched as the weight dot on the growth chart starts trending up, crossing percentiles, increasing out of proportion to the height dot. Growth charts are part of our pediatric DNA; we start at birth looking at the different trajectories of how babies grow — weight, length, head circumference — because children’s business is to grow, and they manifest wellness by healthy and well-proportioned growth, and often manifest problems in their bodies or in their environments by growth that slows or stops or gets out of whack. “I never say to a child that I am putting them on a diet,” Dr. Taveras said. “We talk about a nutrition plan in the context of a plan for physical activity, a plan for sleep, which is just as important as their nutrition plan if you’re trying to achieve weight maintenance.” Dr. Taveras, who is a professor of nutrition at Harvard Medical School, is one of the authors of an essay responding to the controversy, published Monday in the journal Childhood Obesity, titled “Let’s Not Just Dismiss the WW Kurbo App.” The commentary addresses the new technology, but also the larger issues of weight management in children. “I’m really grateful for this app because it has stirred up so much in terms of conversation” among people from different but related disciplines, said her co-author, Michelle Cardel, an obesity and nutrition scientist who is an assistant professor at the University of Florida College of Medicine. Eating disorder specialists, health care professionals treating overweight children and obesity scientists are “ultimately all on the same team,” she said. “What we care about is children’s health, physical health as well as mental and emotional health.” Some of the components of the new app are based on sound nutrition science, Dr. Taveras and Dr. Cardel write, while others are more troubling. They cite evidence supporting the traffic light system the app uses of categorizing foods as green, yellow and red, a system developed by Leonard Epstein in the 1980s. This classification has been incorporated into a number of weight control interventions for children, and has been studied and found to be effective, but never on its own. “The traffic light diet is an effective way of managing energy and food intake in children, but it was always meant to be part of a larger core package intervention or program, with family involvement and interaction with clinicians,” Dr. Cardel said. Since it has been tested in multicomponent interventions, she said, we don’t know how effective it would be as a stand-alone system directed only at children. Dr. Taveras and Dr. Cardel are concerned that the Kurbo app should not be directly aimed at children, and that children should not be advised to do this on their own without parental involvement. (The app is free; users can pay to be paired with virtual coaches, a service that is marketed heavily to parents.) They have specific concerns about whether the classifications for certain foods are based more on quantity and calories, rather than on quality, and they really dislike the pictures with kids’ “success stories” on the app, since those are all about weight loss and appearance, instead of about balanced, proportional growth and healthy activity. “They should have known better,” Dr. Taveras said, pointing out that the fine print — as always — says these are not typical results, and therefore not appropriate for showing to impressionable children. Another concern that has been raised about the new app is that putting too much emphasis on weight loss may lead to low self-esteem, depression and eating disorders. Dr. Cardel cited a systematic review published this May that found that face-to-face treatment programs for pediatric obesity decreased the risk of eating disorders — but those were professionally supervised interventions, not apps. “I certainly don’t want to discount that eating disorders have a high mortality risk, and we always take the approach of ‘first, do no harm,’” Dr. Cardel said. But we also do need to take into account the health issues of obesity, she said, which affects almost one of every five children from 2 to 19 years old, and one in four children in lower socioeconomic groups. It is linked to cardiometabolic disease and certain types of cancer, and also affects a child’s emotional health. Anyone who works with children and families knows this is a sensitive topic, complex to bring up and difficult to discuss. I’ve written before on the topic of weight-shaming and fat stigma, both in the pediatric office and in the family in general. (On this Thanksgiving column two years ago, the comments reflect readers’ painful memories of family brutality around the table as well as fat-shaming, parent-blaming thoughts.) “I never use the word dieting, and I never use the word weight loss, because of the negative connotations,” Dr. Taveras said. “But I can recommend that a family switch from sugar-sweetened beverages to water, or replace processed, calorically dense foods with fruits and vegetables — is that a diet? It’s a nutrition plan.” In the primary care setting, Dr. Taveras said, “I always ask permission, even for talking about B.M.I. and weight, allowing a parent and family to say, you know what, this is something really sensitive to us.” And even when children have been referred to a specialty clinic, often because their weight gain is steep or because their lab tests have begun to reflect diabetes risk and liver problems, the conversation is not about weight loss, but about trying to get the different aspects of growth back into healthy proportion. In her obesity program, Dr. Taveras said, “most of my discussions focus on how children are growing — they have the benefit of gaining in height that adults don’t have.” So the goal with a child is usually to slow down the weight gain and let the child reach a better balance as they get taller. “Compliance is king,” Dr. Cardel said, “not what you eat but what can you stick to over the long term.” With young children, she said, the focus should be on the family, including parents modeling healthy eating, involving a child in cooking and shopping, and not talking negatively about weight — the child’s, their own or other people’s. Emphasize “things that matter to them, feeling strong, having energy, feeling healthy, feeling good,” Dr. Cardel said. As a nutrition scientist, she is aware of obesity-related complications, but “when I’m talking with a child, the focus needs to be on the healthy behaviors, on developing a healthy eating pattern in your life and it being something you enjoy.” You should teach your kids by taking help from Point-system for kids which would help you to develop a healthy and happy child. |
AuthorHi! I am Tim Connolly and I am providing help to parents to bring up their children in a healthy environment. I am working in this profession from last 5 years, if you have any query regarding this please contact me. Archives
June 2021
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